Restraining Yourself for Pleasure? BDSM For 1

So, for anyone who has read a kinky erotic novel or even for anyone out there who has had desires that sit outside what society considers ‘normal’, you may wonder if you would like certain acts that fall under the rather huge BDSM umbrella. And yet, going to a BDSM club and asking someone to try those on you is a big stretch, isn’t it? Yes, some people can go out, ask to try it and not feel like throwing up. 
But for the rest of us, there could be a myriad of reasons we don’t wanna do that. 
It could be:
  • you don’t want people to think you are kinky
  • the idea scares you and you don’t know anyone you can trust to try it on you
  • you really don’t think it would feel good,  but you just wanna know why the fuck people do that to themselves – or more to the point, have someone do it to them
  • you want to try it out before someone else does to see if you have any interest
  • your partner is vanilla and you don’t want to cheat no matter how much something calls to you
Okay, there are also hundreds of other reasons, but listing them would more than likely bore the hell out of all of us, including me.
So how do you find out how something feels without putting yourself out there? Do what I do. I call it BDSM for 1. What does that mean? I try it out on myself. 
When I was first enlightened in my early thirties that there were other people like me out there, I was thrilled, but had no clue what was involved. I remember looking at my first limits list. I’m surprised my eyes did not burst out of my skull.
If I remember correctly, almost everything I ended up checking as a ‘hard limit’. (The differences between that list and my current one make me giggle. Boy have my kinks grown.) About the only thing I was truly interested in at the time, besides understanding the submissive I was, was flogging. Ever since I first saw a picture of a flogger, I was hungry for it. But everything else? EEK! And, to amuse the masses, let me include spanking in with that. I did not want to be spanked, just flogged. It wasn’t until I got my first real spanking, he hit the sit spot, and I zoomed into never-never land that I developed a serious interest in hand-to-ass combat. 
Now, being the kind of person who has no trouble jumping into places she probably should not be, I found a local group, joined and attended my first munch (a TOTAL failure) and then my first play party (fun but not overly exciting). Now, at my first play party, a domme I knew set me up with a new dom to play with. He put on restraints for me to get used to the feeling of and tied me to a chair for awhile and I remember thinking, ‘uh, okay. This is supposed to be exciting?’
I left that party with a good feeling for BDSM and its regular group of people, but without any interest in being restrained. 
Which is why my first BDSM for 1 lesson here is going to be on:
“Restraining Yourself For Pleasure”
I did not find out the joys of being restrained until years later. And I did it accidentally. So, let me explain that this ‘lesson’ is going to include TMI, so if you are at all squeamish about sex, masturbation and all that involves? Turn away now.
So, to do this, what do you need? You and a pair of underwear. Yep. That’s it. Just you and a pair of underwear. BDSM sites will try and sell you on ‘easy-release’ restraints but seriously? You do not need them for this. This is simple, safe, and will give you an incredible jolt as to what being restrained does for you. 
Because NOT EVERYONE enjoys it. And if you don’t, this is something you can get out of so easily that you don’t have to think. The last thing you need to do if you panic is to have to remember how to unlock a set of restraints.
Okay, so are we ready? Good. 
Lie down on your bed while wearing the undies – because yeah, it’s more comfortable there – or wherever you feel most comfortable masturbating. It needs to be in a spot you can sit on a solid surface or lie down on one.
Now, this is actually the part that needs explaining and I hope I can do it to where it makes sense. 
While lying down, push your underwear down to your ankles, but DO NOT remove them. (For the guys, this would probably work best with briefs. Boxers would be too loose. Girls – any of our panties work for this.)

Once they are down at your ankles, bring your ankles toward your body, pushing your knees out to the side or up to do so. Raise your hips just enough to pull the back of your undies underneath them. It does not need to be a lot, just enough that if you tried to kick your feet out, they would not pull out. Put your hips down and release. 
Now, strangely enough, if you did it right, you probably look a bit like a trussed chicken.

That’s attractive, isn’t it? Forget it – that is unimportant.
Now that you are in this most unlikely of positions, do what feels good. You know what I’m talking about. Stroke, press, rub, pinch, finger-fuck…whatever you do when you are bringing yourself pleasure. And let me just say that if you do not know what to do that brings you pleasure it is time to start NOW! If you don’t know how to please your own body, however will anyone else?
At first you might think to yourself, ‘why the hell am I doing this? It feels stupid.’ Keep it up. At some point, if you are like me, as the pleasure blooms your legs will instinctively try to spread out and that’s when it happens. At a highly aroused state of mind to suddenly not be able to move one’s legs more than a few centimeters may give you the feeling you are looking for. 
Does it hike your arousal into a high state instantly? Like going from peace to Def-con 1 in less than a second? For me, the pleasure I receive once I am in this state of mind is compounded by so many times I could not explain it. And my orgasms are always more intense.
But maybe it did nothing for you and you are still wondering why you tried. That’s okay. Maybe being restrained is not for you, or this type of restraint is not for you, or you were just too nervous trying to follow instructions. Only you know for sure. But give yourself a pat on the back for trying. 
There is no harm in trying and if you are the only one who knows what you did? No harm, no fowl…okay, I didn’t start off with that joke, but it flowed anyway. 
Anyway, if you found it did send your arousal higher, I say do it again. And again. And again. Each time, if you are like me, the arousal happens sooner until the moment you push those panties down to your ankles, you are gushing already, your body prepared for what’s coming. Literally.
If this helped or was of interest let me know. I have several ‘things’ I use that I call BDSM for 1 and I will post about them if you are interested.
Trussed Chicken photo: stepnout via photopin cc

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