Trouble at the Polls 4


“Good evening,” says the news anchorman with his usual fake smile. “Have you voted today? If not, you may be in for a long wait if you will be going to one of the following spots.”

The screen switches to the front of a building where a large sign says “VOTE HERE”.

Slowly numbers appear on the screen.

128, 15, 201, 32, 54, 69…

The news anchorman’s voice speaks as new numbers keep popping up.

“If you are headed to one of these polling spots, be prepared. Since this morning, their numbers have been up exponentially. In fact, three of the spots are near one hundred percent voter participation. They instituted a new voting system today and each voter is allowed to go inside of a booth.”

The screen changes to show a booth with a door.

“As you can see, an individual can go inside the booth and lock the door, thus completely protecting their right to a private vote. There is only one problem,” he chuckles.

A computer voice begins to speak as a warning flashes across the screen. “The following is intended for mature viewers. If you are under the age of eighteen, we suggest you turn down the volume.”

The computer voice fades and the news anchorman speaks once again. “This was recorded one hour ago at polling place 252. Be prepared. It is quite… errr political.”

The screen changes to the outside of another voting booth, this one is locked. Sounds begin.
First there are a few bumps. Then a thump. Then…

“Ooh! Oooh! Baby yes! I love it when you vote! Oooh yes! Touch me right there. Oooh, you have nice hands, honey. Do it again.”

A giggle ripples through the air.

“Oooh, baby you have such nice hands. How long have you been voting? Come on, do it again. Oh! Yes, right there! Touch a little harder. Oh, oh oh! Yes, keep going. Vote, vote, VOTE!”

Distinct heavy breathing fills the microphone.

“Oh,” the female voice moans, “an informed voter. How do you feel about the next proposition, baby? Oh! That was a definite yes! Spank me! Ow! Ow! Ow! Such a forceful voter! Do it again! Ouch!”

“Well,” the news anchorman clears his throat as the camera stays on the booth. “As you can see, the touch screen voting system has taken an interesting turn with a female voice that encourages the voter. Male voters are taking ten times as long to vote, female voters, three to five times, and unfortunately the voting booths need to be cleaned between each use, but it is definitely an interesting way to attract the vote. As of right now, the following polling centers have closed their doors as they have reached one hundred percent voter participation.” Numbers run across the screen.

The screen changes and once again the smirking face of the news anchorman appears. “So, what do you think, Ron?” He turns to the meteorologist.

Ron smiles at the camera. “I voted this morning. If they use these all the time, I will vote every election. Now, to the weather…”


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